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332 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 18, 2022
“You don't know me, asshole. You think I'm just an uptight banker. I could be anyone. I could be a guy who has always known he was bi, and couldn't wait to take that out for a test drive. But then he got his ungrateful college girlfriend pregnant and is now an overworked single dad who knows everything there is to know about Peppa Pig but who has been off the market so long he has no idea when he'll ever relieve some of this unbearable tension since he doesn't know how to find some willing, non-creepy single dude with good hygiene to sixty-nine.”
Finally he’s here, and I’m pulling him into my arms. His bag hits the floor with a slap, and we kiss like we haven’t seen each other in a year instead of a month.
“I love you,” he says against my lips.
“I love you more.”
“Is this on your spreadsheet?”
“What?” I ask, still a little dazed from everything.
“Asking me to be your boyfriend?” he goads.
“You’re such an arrogant prick.”
“But now I’m your arrogant prick.”